KADUGUSUMA

All I see is bleakness. All that is left is The pitch black darkness, The soft blanket, The pillow pressed against my cheek, The humming of the fan, And another night to stare at the emptiness, to soak the pillow with tears... All I do is trying... Trying to be non-chalant, When all I feel is too much, too deep. Trying to be care free, When all I care is about everything but me. Trying to mend, When there was nothing broken. Trying to make it right, When I don't even know what's wrong. Trying to be strong, When all I wish is to crawl back to shell. Trying to hold on, When all I wish is to be held. Trying to cling to the remnants, When there was nothing to begin with. Trying to try hard When all I wish is to give up. And then again, All I do is try and try some more... And now, all that left is tiredness That tears the tender muscles; That sucks every ounce of my blood; That seeps deep into the bone; That fills the body with ache... I'm so tired... Tired of trying, Tired of ...

She says there is a beauty in letting go, He says holding on is much more beautiful!   She lets go of her whole heart, Her dreams that were whispered to the empty walls of her room, Her desires becoming something more than a name, Her stubborn joy for life, Her innocence, Her soul All while loving him! Without the weight of empty words, Not needing any assurances, Unknowingly they sign contracts of the soul! A silent promise binding them forever! Holding hands through the rough paths of life, They walk forward They cry, They grieve, They love! TOGETHER! No words No grand gestures Just two souls! He holds on to the versions of herself Which she LOVED about herself! He holds on; To the delicate bond that binds them, To those dreams that made her eyes shine, To the desires that drove her life, To her smile that showered nothing but innocent love, To NOTHINGS of life that were shared with her! To her soul that loved him! Thr...

One may love solitude and yet crave for that one beautiful soul in life. As human beings, we constantly keep searching for one or other kind of companionship. One cannot deny the inbuilt human urge to be fit in, to be part of something large or simply just belong.  The moment one is born, they are someone's child, someone's grandchild, someone's sibling, someone's cousin and so on and so forth. In the years to come, many of these merely become social 'ties' and yet some other become the rope that pulls you through your ups and downs of life, the threads that come together and knit the safety nets one can always fall into and the threads that sew and mend one's broken pieces. In the process of life, these threads get tangled and some remain with knots and many more gets broken and gets blown away in the whirlwind. As we weave these threads into beautiful piece, we may find some new threads that fit better and make the piece even more beautiful.  The threads o...

  'Humanity' is a concept glorified by everyone, understood by few and practiced by even fewer. Does being human make one humane too? Or is it that being humane makes one human?If someone is not humane, does that make them any less human? Ideally speaking, shouldn't humanity come as naturally as breathing to "human beings"? Aren't they the very traits that makes us human?  Is 'humanity' really innate to humankind? If so, why is it so hard to find kind people in the world? why have we reached a point where there is a need to reawaken and remind people to be humane? Is it because, it was never ours to begin with? Is 'humanity' a mere concept that is idealised and developed  later on?  We human beings are often referred to as 'intelligent animals'. Over time we have been focusing on the part 'intelligent ' so much that we have overlooked the next part. We shouldn't forget that though intelligent, we are animals nonetheless. Bei...

It’s in my nature To hang somewhere between Living and dying... Agony doesn’t terrorize my core existence. Usually, I hold on to moments That consume the remnants of my being— Tarnishing the fragments of hope, Churning my soul for a while. My mind believes it is its job to do these things for me! The moment I try to escape the trap inside, It always drags me down to the locked room in my head— Which I often assume is sealed, Full of the same old, relentless chaos! Grappling in darkness, Where the brighter 'Me,' is just a whisper. Shackled by rusted chains of fears and doubts, Beating myself for reasons I can't define, Building a universe of hate for myself I usually let myself bear the weight of unnecessary thoughts alone. Not reaching for the hands that are ready to lift me, Guide me to the light, Lead me to the life Knowingly ignoring the warmth offered by the world; I end up putting the shackles on myself— That's just me fighting the oth...

  It was so good to be in longing, To have something to look forward to; To hope for the D-day; To be away and get lost in imagination. It was             As divine as moonlight;             As colourful as rainbows;             As pretty as flowers;             As beautiful as butterflies;             As soothing as green lush…   I would play it in my head over and over, Each time a different version; Each time a different circumstance; But, nonetheless all happy & beautiful… I would bask in these   imaginations , Making my body vibrate with excitement; Making my heart flutter with joy; Making my soul soak in contentment…   The time passes… The pr...